Sunday, August 20, 2006

Getting it out there

Last night I had to stay up until hubby got home so that I could tell him his mom *might* have suffered brain damage in the past few days in the hospital. We are all hurting right now but I know how bad he is and that kills me. Today I tried to stay busy again. It hurts me to stand up. It hurts me to lay down. It hurts to sit down. Yet I keep telling myself that my MIL has lived with severe pain for the past 20 years and yet she has always made herself keep a beautiful home and more. I feel so selfish saying how miserable I am because I can't imagine what she is feeling right now.

This just hasn't been a good week for us. I feel like I am coming unglued. I found myself crying today while I was taking a shower because I realized I have 4 weeks left of pregnancy. Everything is just adding up and is overwhelming to me. I don't let myself think about anything bad happening to her because I just can't deal with that right now. She and I are really close and I feel like I have to be strong now for my hubby and everyone else including my girls. They keep asking where Nanny is and all I have told them is that she had to go to the doctor. I know hormones are just adding to it. My mind is fried. I have to pull myself together somehow.

Thanks for letting me whine if you got this far. Sometimes you just have to get it all out you know?

1 comment:

Jill said...

:-( Hang in there and wishing the best outcome for your mother in law, an easier last few weeks for your pregnancy, & a sweet little joy at the end that helps take away some of your troubles. :-(